the turducken song

Monday, November 22, 2010

My birthday is December 22nd, just a month away, and though it is precariously close to Christmas, it has usually been the occasion for a very fine party with copious amounts of friends, wines, and food. I’ve been thinking over some of my favorite parties of the past, and came upon a little ditty I wrote for the 1996 birthday party.

I seem to recall that the Wall Street Journal (which I was reading at the time, being on a stock market high with the rest of the world) had run an article on turducken. It’s a Louisiana dish, which debones a chicken, a duck, and a turkey, stuffs one inside the other, and packs the in-between spaces with various types of stuffing (crawdad being de rigeur).

Well I was thrilled at the concept, and commenced a search to find someone in New Orleans who could ship one up to me. This was a bit too soon to find turducken on the internet, which makes it much easier today. But after several phone calls I was able to locate a turducken purveyor, and was initially pleased to learn that the dish was not all that expensive... at least until you added in the shipping cost.

But the pioneering spirit was with me, along with some pretty significant stock profits, and I splurged. I think it cost about $150, and I may have had the first turducken ever consumed in the Seattle area. To commemorate the occasion, I wrote a song, to be sung to the tune of “Winter Wonderland” and I insisted that all the party-goers sing it before being served their turducken.

I offer it to you in the hopes that you will have a holiday turducken some year, and find that an opening sing-along puts the party in gear.

The Turducken Song (sung to the tune of “Winter Wonderland”)

Doorbell rings, we’re excited!
Special day, you’re invited.
A beautiful smell, we’re happy as hell,
Eatin’ in turducken wonderland!

Gone away, is the stressing,
Here to stay, crawdad dressing,
A holiday feast, a succulent beast,
Eatin’ in turducken wonderland!

In the oven we’ll roast our turducken;
We’re all drinking wine and having fun.
We’re glad someone else did all the pluckin’
‘Cause we don’t have an inkling how it’s done!

Later on, we’ll be chuckling,
While we eat our turduckling;
We’ll face unafraid, the dinner we’ve made
Eatin’ in turducken wonderland!



Anonymous said...

LOL How many bottles did it take to compose this wonderful holiday song? lol (huge Smile) merlotman

Anonymous said...

And you found a turducken t-shirt picture to go with your article! Amazing!

1WineDude said...


Your birthday is that close to X-mas? That totally sucks, dude! :)

PaulG said...

Yes, Dude, that is my sad birthday fate. I have always envied my brother, who was born on June 28th. But somehow, with the support of good friends, many fine bottles of wine, a fair amount of single malt whisky, and the occasional turducken, I've muddled through and had a pretty good time doing so.

Charlie Olken said...

Kent Rosenblum claims to have had a dish made with turkey, pheasant, duck and chicken.

That story may be apocryphal, but try figuring out how the name the thing. I think that was Mr. Rosenblum's point all along.

PaulG said...

Charlie, how about turphducken?

Charlie Olken said...

Very close, Paul. Very close.

Post a Comment

Your comment is awaiting moderation and will be posted ASAP. Thanks!